tempest_spiritの日記

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2016年 02月 23日

I'm fighting depression today. I don't have a very good reason for why, it's just there. I saw a quote the other night, "More sleep does no good when it's your soul that's tired." That's how I feel today.

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A friend sent me this Article on exercise. I thought some of you might find it interesting.

For me, at least initially, diet is only part of the equation, and I do need to keep my activity levels up, but it's interesting to me that we're finding nutrition is really the key element in weight loss. I will have to digest this for a while.

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2016年 02月 22日

I now have new clothes to wear to the office, and I finally broke out the hair dye I bought last Spring, and did my hair. I'm naturally a dishwater blond. Now it's a bright Auburn. Everyone likes it. I do too, but am still getting over the shock of seeing myself with such a drastically different color of hair. It's only 9:00 and I'm already tired of hearing about it. LOL!

I didn't do it for the attention. I did it for me, and I guess I've discovered I just really don't care if anyone else likes it; I do. I need to go back and touch it up, as there are some spots at the roots I missed covering. So I'll have my daughter help me with it this weekend.

I guess I'm giving myself a makeover. It just seems time for a change. I'm already trying to work on feeling good about myself, and self care. It just seems logical to be able to wear comfortable clothes, and to wear my hair the way I want to, instead of the way I've always been told I should wear it.

The scale is not moving, which is a touch frustrating, but I'll keep at it. I've had a couple of set backs here and there, but I'm determined, and I have to remind myself I'm not doing this for a number. I'm doing it so I can climb mountains, literally.

My husband agreed to go to marriage counseling with me this weekend, which I thought might be an impossible thing to ask. We're not in dire straits or anything. We're a pretty low conflict couple, but there are just a few things I think we need some help on, not the least of which is dealing with blended family dynamics, and raising a child with a disability.

I've just gotten to a point where I feel like we're really great friends, and awesome room-mates, but in the midst of the daily grind there doesn't seem to be time or energy for much else. I guess I'm at a stage in my life where I hoped we'd have a little bit more than just being friends who work fairly well together on managing a household. And I didn't think we'd be at this point just four years into the marriage either. I can't build the intimacy I want by myself. I know this, I realize, because I've been trying to do just that for about a year, quite unsuccessfully. I'm resentful about it, and it's really through no fault of his. We just need to both get the lines of communication going both ways, I think. Hopefully a counselor can help facilitate that. I guess time will tell.

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2016年 02月 21日

3.5 mile walk with 5 sizeable hills en route; I'm bushed.

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2016年 02月 20日

I don't know how accurate my exercise will come out today. I was helping a friend move, so I did my best to put in equitable estimations of the various tasks, housework, moving furniture, lifting boxes, unpacking things and putting them away, running up and down stairs, and walking back and forth between rooms.I'm pretty worn out.

Her new house doesn't have a microwave, so we ended up eating pickles and chips and dip to keep from running out of steam. I did have a Pepsi today. I generally try to stay away from pop anymore, because it seems once I get started I just don't stop. So this will have to be my one and done.

I did Hip-Hop Zumba last night with a couple of ladies, which wore me out. I woke up at 3 am feeling completely famished. I tried to ignore it, but between hunger pangs and sore muscles, it was impossible to go back to sleep. So I went for 1/2 Tablespoon of peanut butter and 1/2 cup of milk. That seemed to do the trick.

Now, I'm going to go sit on my posterior a while.

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