And another work week begins. I started my day by smiling and appreciating my life. I think I made a small connection there that sometimes I feel guilt - probably survivors guilt - that I can feel happy even without Cutty. That’s usually followed by anger that he should be here, healthy and happy with me, for this phase of our lives. But he isn’t.
So for me to be respectful of the universe and it’s plans for me it’s best that I use the rest of my time productively rather than wallowing in regret and resentment. So instead I’ll:
The birthday party Saturday was Fun. Yes, I actually wrote that: Fun. Although it was the typical Blondie ‘party starts at 3pm but they didn’t even get the burgers on the grill until 5pm resulting in a couple of people making comments to ‘me’ I just brushed it off and played badminton. Yes, badminton.
I haven’t played that game since I was about 13 and it seemed so much slower back then. I used to say it was like tennis on quaaludes. It seems much faster now that I am so much older and slower myself, LOL. However, I got some decent respect when I actually ‘dove’ for the birdie and bounced several feet across the grass.
It was a reaffirmation of how ‘old’ other’s perceive me to be because I think they all feared I broke my hip. So naturally I had to stand up, shake it off, and fight to not limp.
I was feeling like this:
While they are more accustomed to me being like this:
I really had fun (did I just use the F word TWICE?) trying to be all ‘athletic’ … what I lacked in physical I made up for in comical doing the ‘sports growl’. Caddy and I even ‘chest bumped’ a couple of times. Folks were staring at ‘Nana’ as if she’d lost her mind. Oh well, it’ll make for a good defense if I need to plead insanity to something later, LOL.
All is well. I played about two hours so I’m going to do my own ‘activity to miles’ conversion for the 75/30 challenge and log 10 miles on that, LOL. I believe bouncing across the field is an automatic 5 miles. Yes, Philly, you get half my dear CS.
Food? I did have a little of everything but I did it slow and mindfully. Well, as mindful as you can be with burgers & hot dogs and watermelon.
Oh, and I consider this a huge NSV (non scale victory) that I had to circle the grocery store three times to find the ‘chips & snack’ aisle. I was in charge of bringing the ‘cake, buns & chips’ and it’s been so long since I bought chips … well, color me proud I had no idea where they were stocked.
Yesterday was what my Grandmother would have described as ‘puttering around’. The weather continued to be unseasonably cool so the doors and windows were open while I just meandered doing little jobs inside and out.
So that’s about it. Time to face the day. Hope you all face a good one in your world too. Thanks for stopping to visit with me.
Bella
